So I'm watching television the other night... the Discovery Channel to be exact... and I'm viewing a show that I have only heard about, but never personally tuned in for.

The Deadliest Catch is a documentary-style reality television series that documents the events aboard fishing boats in the Bering Sea. The show is named Deadliest Catch because the crew of these boats are at a high risk of injury or death.

The series follows eight to ten crab fishing boats and their crews throughout two of the dangerous crab fishing seasons, the October king crab and the January opilio crab. The show emphasizes the very real danger to the crew on the decks of these boats and with each episode has a focus on a story or situation that occurs on one or more boats with side stories on the backgrounds and particular activities of one or two crew members.

The fleet's captains are featured prominently throughout the episodes... highlighting their camaraderie with their fellow captains and relationships with their crew... as well as their competitive nature against the other boats in the fleet regarding the hunt for crab throughout the fishing grounds.

So anyway... I'm about ten minutes into the Deadliest Catch and I must agree that this job is as they say... quite dangerous. But after seeing the 'dangers' involved on these vessels... I got to thinking... I know of an even more dangerous profession... chat room player... or shall we say chat room spermer.

Once I touch base with buff_lincoln, verian_my_spider_daemon and jimmy_cinderella, I'll get their opinion on maybe producing a show of our own.

I'm thinking this show should be called...THE DEADLIEST SNATCH.

The Deadliest Catch has a creator in Thom Beers. The CRU would need someone to step up and fill this position for their show. Any suggestions? I know who my choice would be.

The narrator for the Deadliest Catch is Mike Rowe. The CRU, since they are generally silent, and 'type their shit' will need to fill this position as well. I'm thinking since Steve (gartner22ny) is well loved by all the ladies, or at least his voice is... should be considered for the narrator of THE DEADLIEST SNATCH. What do you think?

The opening theme for the U.S. TV airing of the Deadliest Catch is "Wanted Dead or Alive" by Bon Jovi. Now taking our title of the THE DEADLIEST SNATCH into consideration, the CRU will need to come up with a title song for their show. Any ideas?


In the Deadliest Catch, a two person camera crew lives on each boat profiled. They use handheld cameras to shoot most of the series. Additional footage is provided by four stationary cameras that are permanently mounted around the ship and are constantly recording.


In THE DEADLIEST SNATCH the CRU will need a two person camera crew as well. Preferably two males who would not blow their load at the sight of a naked woman. I'm thinking the two homosexuals in Dak and Hotshotschamp would be best for this.

And again... in the Deadliest Catch, remember that they utilize eight to ten crab fishing boats. In the show the CRU hopes to put together... THE DEADLIEST SNATCH, the CRU will need to find eight to ten crab infested pusheyholes. These positions should be the easiest to fill.

I'm thinking the CRU could get the below to partake in this venture...

1. Justine (lotusblossom604)
2. Shortybynature_mandi
3. Ine (foxy_the_first)
4. Sherry_berry27
5. Rachel (hastingsgirl)
6. Mary (mary_christine21)
7. Trisha (costergirl16)
8. Veronica (bels_belfour)

If the above choose not to participate we have the below that qualify as well...

9. Jill (boltsgirlvl4)
10. Lindsay (butter_cup0)
11. Tracy (northerncutie08)
12. Sonya (nashvillepredsfan)
13. Debbie (berrybusygirl)
14. Cerah (hockeymom935)
15. Katie (canucks_girl44)
16. Allie (sharks1419)

I'm sure I am missing a few names. ;)

According to the pilot episode of the Deadliest Catch, the death rate during the main crab seasons averages out to nearly one fisherman per week, while the injury rate for crews on most crab boats in the fleet is nearly 100% due to the severe weather conditions (frigid gales, rogue waves, ice formations on and around the boat) and the danger of working with such heavy machinery on a constantly rolling boat deck.

Alaskan king crab fishing reported over 300 fatalities per 100,000 as of 2008, with over 80% of those deaths caused by drowning or hypothermia.

On THE DEADLIEST SNATCH we hope to take the necessary precautions so we do not lose a single male chatter to disease. Just enter at your own risk. ;)

Don't worry girls, the guys will get theirs.

If the CRU can get THE DEADLIEST SNATCH off the ground with any success, I'm sure they will be able to get their next series going soon thereafter.

I'm thinking for the guys we can go with DIRTY KNOBS. A spin off from the Dirty Jobs series, also a Discovery Channel TV show and hosted by Mike Rowe.

For this I'm already thinking of names such as...

1. Jim (zr22k)... anyone that sticks it to danabomb and lotusblossum is in.

2. Ryan (antiwhy)

3. Jeremy (kottonmouth02)

4. Mark (kingvspades)

5. Paul (jerzzzey)

6. Bill (wildbp)

7. James (hoffa75ca)

And many many more. ;)

Come on CRU, I'm leaving it up to you to put it together.