No, there is no manual...

Time flies by without new posts, so here’s one just so my fans will know I’m still here.

Not sure what to do about the accelerating pace of modern life; in thought experiments about relativity, Einstein tells us that subjective time slows dramatically the faster we go, so that when we accelerate to close to the speed of light and approach the event horizon it seems more and more like everything else is slowing down.

I don’t know about that. I do know that I spent the first 20 years or so of this planetary existence more or less waiting for my life to begin, and subsequently have somehow shifted gears into a mode of not wanting it to end. I enjoy my life, my family, my work, my friends, the challenges and frustrations of the days. It is a matter of the utmost fascination to be alive in a generation that has seen such changes in the way ordinary people live. And there is the thought, the urge, somehow embedded deep in one’s awareness, that it would be extraordinarily good to make some kind of difference, have some positive impact, before fading away into nothingness.

One of the many unfinished projects that clamors for my attention is making a man out of Oz, now in development, that will address the art of fatherhood.

Oz, learning to be a good father is not for wimps. It takes time, energy, interest, and responsibility. Most of all, it takes you loving your child. When raising a child, no two days are the same, each day brings new questions and new challenges. It often leaves us asking ourselves: "Where and how do we learn to become a good father?"

The bad news is there's no manual to teach men how to be good dads... and no, they didn't forget to hand it to you before you brought your baby home.

This is where I come in.

It's important for fathers to learn about parenting because dads play unique roles in their child's life. Research shows that children who grow up with fathers who stay involved in their lives tend to enjoy all kinds of benefits:

-better school performance
-less trouble with the law
-better jobs and careers
-better relationships with others

First off Oz, you must cut down your chat hours. Maybe 3-4 days a week with a maximum 4 hours a day.

Watch reruns of The Cosby Show, Home Improvement, Father Knows Best and see how fathers stay involved with their families. There are lots of media examples of fathers, and it's all fantasy entertainment, something that you can relate to, but you could still possibly learn a thing or two.

Oz, you can learn a lot about being a parent by watching how others do it. Make a friend who has a successful marriage and is an excellent father. Watching other dads is good... talking about being a dad can be even better. Unfortunately, you don't typically talk about being a dad. When you get together with your chat mates, you're more likely to talk about sports, fantasy GM and commissioner responsibilities, what's for dinner, etc.

There are educational videos, where you can watch other dads in action, learning by example.

Parenting classes are often useful for learning how to be an effective father. Folks used to go to parenting classes when they were having a specific problem. Now, parents find these classes valuable even before any real problems show up.

The simplest, and most important, message about learning to be a good father is to just do it. Your interest in learning to be the best dad you can be is an indicator that you are going to become just that.

So, the words of wisdom for today:

If you don’t have time for anything, you need to take time for nothing, so you can make something out of your time.

Be still. Pay attention to what is at hand or in lap. There is a miracle in it, right now.

Remember Oz...

Tomorrow is another day!